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Circumstantial flummery from a would-be spoonbean hustler.

What sucks about falling in love with secret agents.

Stylish, taciturn, occasionally murderous. These things can really only end badly:

  1. The secret agent dies.
  2. You die, killed by enemies trying to get to the secret agent.
  3. The secret agent resents you for the entirety of your time together because emotionally stable people content with mundane, everyday existances don’t pursue careers as secret agents.